In the latter 1800s, Alfred Lord Tennyson, an English aristocrat, invited a Russian nobleman to his estate to stay for a while.

Early one morning, the Russian nobleman went hunting on Tennyson’s vast estate. He looked forward to the day taking dogs, guns, and servants.

At mid-day, he returned & Lord Tennyson asked him how he did. He answered, “Not very well. I shot two peasants.”

Lord Tennyson thought momentarily and said, “No, we pronounce it with a ‘ph’ here. It is ‘pheasants.’ You shot two pheasants.”

“No,” the nobleman replied, “I shot two peasants. They were insolent towards me, so I shot them”!

Now we smile in disbelief at a story like that, but it really happened. I live in South Wales near Swansea. Last year, a driver in Swansea reportedly abused another driver, a woman in road rage.

She was injured, and the man was charged with assault. When asked why he was angry and abusive, he said he was offended by her. He was so offended that led to anger because he didn’t like how she looked at him in her rear-view mirror.

But stories like that pop up all over the country. People can become abusive because they are offended on some level.

According to the Cambridge Dictionary, offended means simply to make someone upset or angry. It can be intentional or unintentional.

Have you ever lost your temper or become upset over a small thing? Do you ever do things you wish you hadn’t done or say things you wish you had never said? I can undoubtedly say YES to that!

Wisdom from the Bible

The Bible has something to say about overcoming offence. Proverbs 19:11 says, “A person’s wisdom gives him patience. It is to his glory to overlook an offence.”

In other words, if someone offends you, be patent with that person. If it was unintentional or not, you can easily forgive and overlook it if you are a person of wisdom (God’s wisdom).

It’s not wise to allow the situation to become a significant event to the point it overwhelms you causing rage.

You may say- “but I have a right to be offended!” I would ask- “but why?”

How does being offended and reacting to it violently make for a better world?

Offence can quickly escalate into violence, as seen in these two stories. Wars have begun due to offence. So, is it better to let things go when no serious harm is done?

But what happens if the offence is enormous, significantly impacting you? Well, keep reading to find out.

Offence and Your Wellness

In today’s society, ideas of offence and wellness intersect, leading to various problems.

Offences can arise from various sources, including insensitive comments, discrimination, and hate speech.

I have been a victim of hate speech many times. It has happened online and in my face from various people. It’s not nice so I know what impact it can have on our holistic health and wellness.

When someone posted online hateful things about me I forgive them, but it left me unwell for some time. Such incidents can significantly impact our mental and emotional well-being.

The detrimental effects of offence on wellness can be significant. Offense can profoundly impact an individual’s well-being of mind, body, and spirit.

The emotional toll it takes can lead to stress, anxiety, and depression. Continued exposure to offensive behaviour can create a hostile environment. I will erode one’s self-esteem and sense of belonging.

Also, offensive behaviour can exacerbate pre-existing mental health conditions. It can hinder personal growth, and negatively affect relationships.

The Online Problem

The prevalence of online offences is so common now. With the rise of social media, online platforms have become hotbeds for offensive content.

Cyberbullying, trolling, and hate speech are rampant these days. Posting severe threats to individuals’ severely affects the victim’s mental health.

The anonymity provided by the internet often emboldens offenders. They don’t care about how others may be affected. Improper use of the internet can create a breeding ground for toxicity, further exacerbating the problem.

Potential Solutions

The impact of offence in the workplace can be very upsetting to experience. Offensive behaviour can contribute to a toxic work environment. This will hinder productivity and employee well-being. Discrimination, microaggressions, and harassment can lead to high levels of stress. The victim may be fearful to go to work, decreasing job satisfaction.

Addressing offence and promoting wellness through education and awareness is essential. Public education campaigns and initiatives can raise awareness about the impact of offensive behaviour.

We can foster empathy and understanding wherever we work. We can help individuals better appreciate the need to treat others respectfully. We can promote empathy and emotional intelligence by encouraging the development of empathy.

Exercise our Emotional Intelligence

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) is your ability to recognize your emotions and recognize the emotions of others. We can use this awareness to develop your behaviour and relationships. Emotional intelligence can assist to understand the consequences of our words and actions. This can lead to more considerate behaviour and reduced instances of offence.

Develop Policies and Regulations.

Churches, and other organisations, can implement policies and regulations. Governments and organisations must establish clear guidelines and policies that condemn offensive behaviour.

By enforcing consequences for offenders, individuals are held accountable, discouraging further offence instances.

Let’s Do This Together

The complex relationship between offence and wellness demands our attention and collective effort. So, let’s build supportive communities by creating safe and inclusive online and offline spaces. This allows individuals to seek support, share experiences, and find solace. It also fosters a sense of belonging and connectedness, promoting overall wellness.

Let’s seek to improve ours and others psychological well-being, by tackling problems associated with offence.

The church can lead the way in the vital work towards creating a society that values respect, empathy, and inclusivity.

By working together, we can mitigate the harmful impact of offensive behaviour on ours and others wellness.

If this article has helped you in a small way, please like and feel free to comment. Please subscribe to receive regular updates, and it will help me to reach more people- thank you.

Thank you for reading to the end. For more articles, visit, Your Wellness Matters at www.paularoseparish.com. We collect Donations for Welsh Women’s Aid -Thrive the Pt Talbot division. If you wish to find out more & donate, click HERE.

I have worked internationally with over 40 years of experience, having a Bachelor of Pastoral Counselling and Theology and a Master of Arts in Counselling & Professional Development. BACP Life Coaching Certificate. I currently work as a Christian educator, blogger, author, and grandmother living with my two dogs in Wales, UK.

If you wish to connect with me, please do so on paularoseparish@gmail.com

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